Who is this woman?

Who is this woman in this picture?

I know she is me, but that is about it. I cannot imagine what her thoughts are when this picture was taken. I am pretty sure she was loving the pink hair, and the freedom she had so that she could have pink hair.

I know that she had recently quit her 9-5 job to pursue a business, building a team with Senegence. I also know she was feeling very desperate to get that business going. She had some customers, but it seemed like no one wanted to sign up and build their business with her. She tried everything in her power to get people to follow her.

I know that her family was starting to crack at the seams. What she doesn’t know, that I do know, is that she is about to go through the most trying and heart wrenching season of her life. She is going to see her marriage completely wither up and almost die. She is going to see her oldest daughter struggle with depression and suicidal ideation. She is going to have to go through the hardest weekend of her life when that same daughter is kidnapped by her biological father. And to top it all off, she is going to witness her youngest daughter, who had always had a heart for God, start falling further and further away from God.

This woman in the picture is not prepared for all of this to happen, but there is light at the end of the dark tunnel she is staring down.

The woman in this picture had started going to a biblically-based church, a few months before she took this picture. When she took this picture, she was still running from God. When she would go to church, the message was falling on her deaf ears. Her spirit had not yet been filled with life-giving words. She was not ready, but what she did not know was that God was cultivating and weeding the path that she was on. He was preparing her heart, soul, mind, and spirit to receive His Holy Spirit.

I do know who this woman is. She was me, before that giant God-sized hole in my spirit was filled with His Holy Spirit.

She was me, before I completely surrendered my life to God.

She was me, before God whispered obedience=blessings in my ear.

She was me, before I started filling my life with the Word and prayer.

 She was the me I had to be, to be the me I am today.

She was me, who God was preparing to go through a very hard time in her life.

She was me, before God healed my marriage.

She was me, before God healed my family.

She was me, before God.

I love her, but I am so grateful that I am no longer her.

She was me, before God filled my life with meaning,

 and purpose,

and peace,

and love,

and joy,

and truth,

and all the good stuff that God blesses His children with.

That is who I am today because He forgave and redeemed the woman I was in this picture.

“Now, if anyone is enfolded in Christ, he has become an entirely new creation. All that is related to  the old order has vanished.  Behold, everything is fresh and new.”

2 Corinthians 5:17; The Passion Translation

Do you have a testimony that you would love to share? I would love to feature it on this blog. Please contact me at celeste.sowder@gmail.com to submit your testimony to be featured on The Praying Momma blog and Facebook page.